2009 started out alright, towards the beginning of the year, my wife and I started renting a fairly big house here in Wakarusa. Great school system for the kids, great small town atmosphere. Samantha was going to school with her cousins and both kids liked the new place. Their rooms were huge and I think they just loved the change. I got to help coach Samantha’s baseball team and had a blast and she loved having her daddy on the team. Something I looked forward to since I had kids and I can’t wait to do it again.

I’ve watched my kids grow this year. Both are getting tall and growing so fast. Samantha started 2nd grade in the fall, played her first year of pitch baseball, had a blast doing gymnastics. started going over to friends houses, is really become a great reader. Trevor finally potty trained, learned to ride his bike, learned to write his name and to count, started pre-school, and is just starting to become his own person. Both are really great kids and I am a lucky parent.

Then it started falling apart. I guess I had known for awhile, maybe even for years, but it really started to sink in that my wife no longer loved me. I had thought about leaving for a long time but I think I was comfortable and I kept telling myself that is just how she was. But the final straw was when she turned down the position to get back on 1st. The position that would have put her back in our families lives. As it was then, I saw her for a few minutes between my shift and hers and for about 20 minutes when she got home and that was it. She saw the kids even less so when she turned down that position I was pissed, I was hurt, I was crushed. That was the final straw, it sank in that there was no more love. I had still loved her at this point, of that I have no doubts. In the next few months, I saw everything else in a new light and saw all the signs I had been ignoring for what they were. I spent evenings crying in my pillow after I put the kids to bed. It finally came time to end it, so I did. We discussed it and decided to separate after 15 years of marriage.

But what came out of this was a new found love. While going through all this on my own, I reached out for help, for someone to talk to and one person responded. We became really good friends, everything just kind of clicked with each other and once I was separated, we decided to become an item. She was there to listen to me complain and she listened. She was there when I was questioning everything around me and she put my questions in perspective. She was there when I was down and picked me up. For the first time in a really long time, I felt loved by a woman again. She made me realize how much I was missing by staying in a marriage with someone who didn’t love me. As this year closes, we’ve been together for 7 months now and still going strong.

So what is to come in 2010? Well so far it looks like I’ll be moving into a bigger place in order to accommodate my bigger family as Cheri and her kids will be moving up here this summer. I look forward to mixing our families together and I look forward to being there for Cheri and her kids. I look forward to watching my kids grow more as Samantha will be starting Girl Scouts and playing baseball again. And Trevor will be starting Kindergarten and playing his 1st year of t-ball. I look forward to helping raise Chris and Skyler, whether they feel that I am a step-father to them or not, I want to be there for them in that capacity. And as far as I am concerned, I will have 2 more kids. I really look forward to just being with Cheri on a daily basis.

So as bad as 2009 was, it was also good. 2010 is looking promising, but as most of you know, you always think your future will be better. Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn’t. But I look forward to it all the same and remain positive that I’m on the right track with my life and with my kids lives.

A littler later, the kids and I were walking downtown, and I got a text from her saying she just had another “episode” and I hit send on my phone and called her. That would be the first time we actually talked and I think I shocked her by calling. I can even show you where on the sidewalk I was when I received her text. I don’t remember calling again for awhile but our discussions got deeper and deeper. We started IM’ing through yahoo and we started doing tell all questions, ask any question you want and the other had to answer truthfully. This, of course, is really where we got to know each other. About this time in the relationship, I was still in total denial of what I was feeling for her. I could tell she liked me but wasn’t sure what to do, I was in a marriage for 15 years and had never really dated before my wife. Never thought I would end up separated or divorced and have to do it ever.

She ended up coming into town and staying with another classmate of ours, we got together at Hacienda. By this time, I think we both knew what we wanted but we’re afraid of complications because of distance amongst other things. We’ve both recounted this evening and I think we both went into it hoping we wouldn’t like the other like we thought we did. But that didn’t happen, we picked up like we’ve known each other for years (I guess technically we have.) We went back to Nancy’s and went 4 wheeling, they didn’t have enough 4 wheelers for everyone so a couple of us rode together, obviously, I rode with her. She drove and I just rode with my arms around her, I even remember putting my head on her shoulder some, I was just so happy to be there. Afterwards we watched a movie and we cuddled on the couch and probably could have all night long. Everything just felt right.

It all steamrolled from there. We talk, text, IM, e-mail all day and night long. If you ask one of us where the other is at any time of the day, we could probably tell you. Here lately we’ve even called and had a few conversations upwards of 5 hours. We just do whatever we’re doing and keep the other on the line. Sometimes we just sit around our homes and have each other on speaker, carrying on conversations with our kids, kinda of a stretch but it makes the other feel like they are there.

We both feel that this relationship is by far the best we’ve each ever had. Open and honest, we talk about anything and everything. As corny as it sounds, we complete each other. We have so much in common but our differences make up for each other’s deficiency’s. All we want and feel is to be together all the time. Between me having little ones and I refuse to leave them and her uprooting hers and a great job that would be tough to leave, it may not happen for a long time. But we both say we would rather have what we have than not have each other at all. We are both 100% committed to the other. It makes for some bad evening where we just want to be together but it also makes the times we are together so much better.

Now here we are, 6 months later, and we have a cult following. Some classmates and friends follow our relationship and there was even a stretch where neither of us posted anything and a couple of people send messages to us asking if everything was ok, we were too quiet. We’re cheesy and make some people sick with our comments about our love for each other, but we don’t care. As long as we’re talking, we’re happy. And we are both happier than we have ever been.

All I think about when I’m alone now is how much I want to be there. I realize one week doesn’t show how we’ll be actually living together. I realize to drop everything here and move there would be a huge step. I realize our love for each other doesn’t mean we will always get along. I also realize that I don’t care. I can’t stop thinking about the times we have spent together and how happy I am during those times. It sounds corny but it is so true with us, we complete each other.

It doesn’t feel fair that we can be so much in love and we can’t even live in the same state. It feels like I’ve done something wrong and am being punished, it is torture. Thank God for technology. We text while we’re at work, talk on the phone every chance we get (had a 6 hr. 39 min. conversation the other night) and IM when we’re both sitting at home on our computers. As much as we talk or chat, I want more. Maybe I’m being selfish for not being content on what we have but she does so much for me that I haven’t had in a long time. She makes me feel loved. With her words and her voice, with her looks and her touch. She actually wants to be around me and I have missed having that feeling of someone who loves me the way she does. Hell, I may have never had that feeling, I just don’t know anymore.

It’s not fair that the one person who makes me extremely happy lives 600 miles. Don’t give me this crap about life isn’t fair and blah, blah, blah. I don’t care, it isn’t fair and it most certainly sucks. We have both discussed this and we both feel it’s better to have what we do then not have anything at all so we’re both in for the long haul. I just hope, for both our mental states, that it isn’t too long of a haul.

I think about my family, who most of them live back in Indiana, and as much as I love them, we do a lot of communicating through text and internet means now so that part wouldn’t change much. I would miss all the parties and get together’s because they are one of the biggest reasons I love my family. We are all so tight and close and we get together enough just to hang out. I would definitely miss my mom, who is always there for me for whatever I need her for. She raised me to be the man I am today and I like to think that she did a pretty good job.

I think about my job, which I do like. I just don’t like some of the people I work with and some of the changes they have made recently have left a sour taste in my mouth. I could definitely walk away from it. I have a few friends there I would miss, but I’m not really that close to anyone. The one person I thought I was close to has proven to me in the past that we aren’t as close as I thought.

I think about my kids, which are the only things keeping me from moving here. If I could, I would bring them in a heartbeat. But a lot would have to happen, I could never take them from their mother for one. I grew up with a single parent and although I had a pretty good childhood, I think no kid should grow up without both parents if at all possible. Obviously there are some exceptions, some parents just never should have had kids but we won’t go into all that. I wouldn’t do that to my kids, or to their mother. I would have to make multiple trips back to Indiana because I know some grandparents who wouldn’t want to go too long without seeing them. And for what I have here, I would definitely be willing to drive back and forth regardless of how often.

And what do I have here you ask? Someone who loves me for me, someone who makes me feel alive again, someone I don’t think i could live without for starters. I feel so at home here, even last night just sprawled out on the couch watching the Colts game. It just feels right. I get along with her kids alright, the son and I get along pretty good. The daughter is a work in progress, I get along with her for the most part, she just does a lot of things towards her mother that I couldn’t just let go. They both do that, but the daughter is the worst at it. I enjoyed going to the sporting events of the kids, the daughter in volleyball and this Saturday she’s in a band competition that I’m looking forward too. The son is in bowling, which is a sport I know, and although we missed most of his games on Saturday morning, I enjoyed watching him and am looking forward to watching him again this coming Saturday.

My girlfriend could use the help and I so want to be the one to help. I do things for her I wouldn’t have done in the past, and by that I mean basics like offering to take the trash out or take the dog out. I see how busy she is and how stressed she gets and I want to do whatever I can to relieve that. I feel that I owe her that much for the way she makes me feel. Which is like I’m the most important person in the world. Just random touches and hugs and kisses. Just the way she doesn’t forget about me when I’m in the room. I catch her watching me and as much as it annoys me to be stared at, it makes me smile that she feels that way about me. She loves me and has no problem telling me or showing me. And as pathetic as I feel that makes me, I need that verification after the last 10 or 15 years I’ve had.

Right now we are just living one day at a time, for the most part we are 600 miles from each other. Which makes the time we have together all that more special. And neither of us care if we are really doing anything, as long as we are doing it together. I hate shopping, yet I’ll go into Walmart or grocery shopping or where ever she goes and just enjoy being with her.

What’s in the future for us? Who knows, I guess my feeling is that when her kids graduate, she’ll move to Indiana until my kids graduate then we’ll both move here. There are many of variables that will go into all that decision making such as her job or major changes elsewhere, but that is how I see it. I’m not sure how she see’s it, I don’t think she’s all that keen on going to Indiana but we’ll see. That’s all at least 3 or 4 years away.

People don’t like me at work for various reason, and I don’t care. You hear rumors about me depending on who you talk to and I don’t care. I probably start half the rumors doing things I shouldn’t but I don’t care. Now with my separation and inevitable divorce, the rumors are really flying and I thought I didn’t care. Apparently I was wrong. She was my wife’s friend as well as mine. She still is and that’s fine with me, I’ve never asked anyone to take sides. Most people have been good about this and are still friends with both. Only 1 person comes to mind that was both of our friends doesn’t like me anymore. And that hurt. I’ve always been able to shrug people off that don’t like me, even friends who have gotten mad at me. But for some reason it bugged me and took awhile to get over it. Technically you could probably say I’m not completely over it.

Anyways, today at work, my soon to be ex-wife came in and pulled the friend mentioned above over to the side and started talking. I could see my wife keep turning around and looking at me so I know they were talking about me. I guess technically I didn’t “know” but you know what I mean. It brought up a lot of feelings of getting made fun of when I was younger. Like I said, normally it doesn’t bother me, but for some reason this time did. Drudged up all those feeling of being left out and being picked on.

I guess those feelings never really go away. You may learn to deal with those doing it to you and you may learn to bury it, but you never forget how it feels to be on this end. It caused me skip many, many days of school growing up. I hated school. Now that I’m older, I realize it wasn’t school that I hated, but the way I felt at school. I like to go through those old high school photos on my friends facebook accounts but looking at them also depresses me. Reminds me of all those feelings again.

I have grown and have a decent life. I’m in love, have 2 wonderful kids and a consistent job. I have the usual complaints of working too much and not enough money but I would describe my life now as happy most of the time. Which makes me realize how much those repressed feelings can hold over you when brought to your attention. I’m hoping by typing this blog, that I will make myself realize that very thing so they can’t control my life. And who knows, maybe somebody out there may learn something as well.

I texted Cheri “I feel all alone”
her response “why?”
me “not sure how it started but i’m realizing how few friends I have. Which would be zero”
and so on

All awhile this is going on, I noticed we are only running 3 anodizers (I know most are lost but try to bear with me.) It irritated the crap out of me that we were working all weekend and we’re not even running full production. I go to break and just start ripping into the guy running the middle section (who was only doing what his line leader told him too.) Literally, couldn’t stop myself, I was so pissed. After break, I went back upstairs to work and started thinking, why did that bother me so much, I’m used to the stupid things they do here at work, it doesn’t usually irritate me that bad. The more I thought about it, the more I understood, it was a reaction to my mood. So I had to contemplate on what mood I was in and why. In the end, it came down to being frustrated that the one person who understands me and the one person that I love lives 600 miles away and it was frustrating me.

I’m a thinker, I like to work out problems in my head. Every time Cheri and I are together and we leave, I spend the next couple of hours just trying to think of way for us to be together and both of us have what we want. After a couple of really good evenings this week chatting with her online, some really good, deep conversations. I found myself doing it again, just trying to figure out a way. I wanted to talk to someone about it, but I just don’t really have that kind of friendship with anyone else other than Cheri and I think today I got to a breaking point. Once I realized what all the feelings were about, I felt stupid and embarrassed and ashamed of the way I acted. I couldn’t believe I drug stuff from home into the work place, hence the something I rarely ever do.

In the end, I apologized to the guy that I gave a hard time too (I think he was shocked.) He harassed me some, and said we were cool. I even told everyone in the break room at lunch that I was wrong and that I had apologized to him.

After I identified what was bugging me, everything kinda fell back in place, my mood lifted and I felt better. I’m not sure what lesson you are supposed to take from this blog, but I know once I figured out it had nothing to do with the guy, I felt like crap. I always got on people for dragging their home life into work and taking it out on other people, and here I was doing the same thing. One lesson I guess I can take from this is next time someone is yelling at me, maybe I shouldn’t give it back because they just may need to vent and as long as it doesn’t hurt me, let it go. I have a real hard time letting things go when I feel that I’m wronged and I guess I feel wronged by falling in love with someone who I can’t be with physically. Mentally, we are strong, we know what we want and we both know what’s holding each back from moving. The problem is, we’re both good parents and neither want to leave their kids. I guess I can blame my mom for teaching me family always comes first. I know one day, we will both be together, I just hope I don’t go crazy or do too much of the stupid stuff mentioned above before it happens.

What makes this even more rare is that Mark Buehrle is not a power pitcher, usually perfect games or even no-hitters are thrown by power pitchers, guys that’ll strike out half the guys he faces. Mark relies on his defense, he struck out 6. Who was the defense behind him? We’ll start with his battery mate,

Catcher – Ramon Castro, again, who? He is the Sox back up catcher and today was the 1st time he caught Mark Buehrle. The Sox just picked him a month or so ago.

1st base – Josh Fields, the Sox transplanted backup 1st basemen when he lost his starting position at 3rd. note-Fields hit a Grand Slam in this game as well to put the Sox up 4-0.

2nd base – Jayson Nix, the Sox backup utility guy, 2nd major league season

3rd base – Gordon Beckham, the Sox starting rookie 3rd basemen, who played shortstop in the minors. Today was only his 41st game in the majors.

Shortstop – Alexei Ramirez, the Sox starting shortstop who played 2nd base all last year. Only his 2nd major league season, 1st at shortstop

Left Field – Carlos Quentin, the Sox starting left fielder, but is only starting his 5th (I think) game since missing most of the 1st half of the season due to injury.

Center Field – Scott Podsednik, the Sox starting center fielder, who signed a minor league deal at the beginning of the year and got the call up when Carlos Quentin went down with an injury. Has been the MVP of the Sox since.

Right Field – Jermaine Dye, the Sox starting right fielder. Has been for years.

Designated Hitter – Paul Konerko, the Sox usual starting 1st basemen, given the day off from the field.

Defensive Replacement, center field – DeWayne Wise, why do I mention him? Because he made an amazing catch in center field to take away a HR in the 9th inning to preserve the perfect game.

As you can see, today’s line-up was not our usual line-up. But apparently it was the perfect line-up.

As I watched the game, I was thinking about what I know about Mark Buehrle. I know I like him, he’s one of my favorites on the team. He’s from St. Charles (been there) and is a St. Louis Cardinals (been there too) fan. Why do I mention that? Because a lot of Sox fans get upset when he publically admits he wants to pitch for the Cardinals. Me, personally, thinks this makes him human. He loves the Sox and doesn’t want to leave. He wants to pitch for the team that he grew up with, that made him a baseball fan. I admire him for making those statements. He wasn’t demanding to be traded, just daydreaming. Apparently because he makes millions, he’s not suppose to daydream. From what I hear, he’s an all around good guy, very laid back, loves his family and loves the game. Always shows up to play and wants to win. He pitches fast (never understood the whole walking around after every pitch) and could care less if the other team tries to slow him down. Like I said, one of my favorites.

This perfect game couldn’t have happened to a better guy. I applaud Mark Buehrle with my hands and my heart. I even cried when it happened, tears of joy. As a Sox fan and as a Buehrle fan. I watched his no-hitter a few years ago and have now seen a perfect game thanks to him. Memories that I will cherish the rest of my life. Thank you and Congratulations Mark Buehrle.

I can go back as little as 6 months and can tell you I didn’t think much of myself. Funny thing was, I didn’t even know it. I had confidence in my ability, always have, but my self esteem had taken a hit in the last 5 years or so. I won’t go into why as that isn’t important. What is important is how I came to the realization that my self esteem was in the toilet. I met a girl, sounds simple enough, little did I know this girl would turn my world around. What started off as a friendship, someone I could turn to just to complain or share in my joy, blossomed to what it is today.

What is it today, you ask? A real life fairy tale unfolding in front of me. Cheri and I live 600 miles a part and yet I feel closer to her than I ever have anyone. Thanks to technology, we can stay in touch 24/7. We text when one or both aren’t home, and instant message when we both are. We share pictures and videos all the time, even just to show ourselves for the day. But what does all this have to do with my self perception. Well, it’s all because of the little things that I have missed for many years. The compliments about me, the caring voice when i’m doing something stupid and when we’re together, the touching, the hand on my back, the coming up behind me and hugging me, the holding hands, the caressing and even the cuddling.

Again, what does this have to do with perceptions of oneself? I don’t remember what I was like 6 months ago. but I can tell you how I am today. I walk around with my head held high, I catch myself smiling all the time, I sing out loud, whistle, clap all just while I’m walking around. In general, i’m just a happier person. You can’t be that happy and have no self esteem. Cheri has been heaven sent just for me, she makes my life a way better place than it ever was. She has raised my esteem to heights I never thought it could go, just by showing me that someone can love me and find me attractive again. It amazes me how much one persons perception of another can make that person’s perception of themselves so much better.

In closing, remember those perceptions travel both ways, remember next time you are making fun of someone, how your perception of them might effect the perception they have on themselves. I’ve been there as well, it helped me grow but it took it’s toll on me when I was in school. But all that is in the past, I’m as happy as I can be and I see no reason for it to end anytime soon.

Wednesday, July 1st – Samantha’s birthday – Got up and went to work as usual. It was a good day, I didn’t get in trouble – lol. At least not bad enough that I remember a week later. After work, I went to the dollar store and picked up a bunch of stuff for the house like a shower curtain, trash cans & bags, soaps, bathroom accessories, toilet paper (main reason for the stop), ect. Put my curtain up and showered and headed to my moms where we were all going to Chuck-E-Cheeses for Samantha’s birthday. If your going to go, go on a Wednesday. It was actually nice, not very many kids and quiet or at least as quiet as a Chuck-E-Cheeses can be. Afterwords, I came home and put away some things my mom had gotten me (glasses, toaster, ect.) and packed my clothes for my trip and then went to sleep on my air mattress in the living room.

Thursday, July 2nd – Went to work for 4 hours. Got out at 11 and hit the bank, topped off the gas tank and grabbed some lunch at Long John Silvers and headed out for Virginia. Wasn’t nearly as bad of a trip as I thought it would be. Made it down in 9 hours, got a police escort for most of the way between Fort Wayne and Indianapolis. There was cop traveling down and there were about 20 or 30 of us behind him, nobody wanting to pass him. Eventually people started figuring out that he was just traveling like the rest of us. I ended up passing him doing 10mph over the speed limit at the time. Later, I topped 100mph at one point of the trip. But for the most part averaged around 85-90mph. Made it all the way without a problem until I got within 20 miles from Cheri’s then missed a turn. Eventually I got there after a few phone calls to Cheri. It was great just to hear her voice, let alone grab her and hold her when I got there. We sat down for some supper and talked. We weren’t sure how to talk without typing but we managed – lol. I showered and then we went to bed and cuddled and talked for awhile.

Friday, July 3rd – Woke up gradually, man it was nice just to sleep in. Had some breakfast and then Cheri, Skyler and I went to cruise the big city of Bristol. Ended up at an antique place so Skyler could show Cheri a table. We walked through the whole place and as much as I don’t want anything to do with antiques, I had a really good time. Just walking around with Cheri and joking around with Skyler, everything just felt natural, like I was supposed to be there. Afterwords, we were heading back home and Chris called wanting to get out of the house, so we picked him up and went bowling. Chris, Skyler and I bowled while Cheri just sat and cheered us on (with a camera, no big surprise there.) Had a really great time, again, just felt natural. Chris and Skyler were choosing our music, I had to give my money to Chris though because he likes the same as me. Afterwords we went back and hung out at the house for a little bit until I got my surprise. Cheri was taking me to a Bristol White Sox game with fireworks afterwords. Chris went with us as well. We took chairs and sat on the hillside. It was great, 2 of my greatest loves, Cheri and baseball. Watched the Sox beat the minor league team of the Cardinals 5-1 before they started the fireworks. I think Cheri watched all the people going by, not sure if she knew there was a game going on – lol. Of course, she knew about half of them too. Chris went and hung out with his friends so it ended up being Cheri and I for almost the whole game. I think Cheri was worried that I wasn’t having fun because of the ballpark but I truly had a great time, I don’t think she knows how much I appreciated her sitting with me at a game. Afterwords we hit Taco Bell then home.

Saturday, July 4th – Independence Day – Got up a little later than we planned. Eventually got around and went and picked up Chris and headed for the Breaks Interstate Park. It was about an hour and a half away. Half that distance was on windy 2 lane roads, it was great. Once we got there we hit the trails and hiked for awhile. Great scenery, love the mountains. Had an absolutely wonderful time. Hiking in the mountains is one of my favorite things to do. Hiking with the one you love was even better. After we eventually wore ourselves out, we headed back home, I stayed awake in the car, barely. Went back home, changed, and went out to Cheri’s parents house for supper. Sat down for supper, I apparently passed a mom test by eating a salad with my meal. Then we lit off some fireworks. I had a good time here as well. Went home and I kicked back on the couch while Cheri was on the Internet and once again, just felt like the most natural thing in the world.

Sunday, July 5th – Got up a lot later than planned, not that I’m complaining. Packed up all my stuff, including all the stuff Cheri got me. Procrastinated long enough to have some lunch and watch the first inning of the Sox game. I hated leaving. I had such a great time even when we were doing everyday stuff. All 3 of them made me feel like I was part of their family. It was a very relaxed weekend, I never felt nervous meeting Skyler (I had already met Chris) and I was never nervous at their place, like it was home. I couldn’t have asked for a better weekend. Eventually I left and headed home, took me awhile as I hit crappy weather all the way to Kentucky where the weather cleared but I hit a traffic jam about 60 miles south of Lexington where it took me about an hour to travel 5 miles. About half way home my stereo went out on my car. Cheri claims all this was telling me I shouldn’t have left, like it wasn’t hard enough to leave. I ended up getting home around 1am and crashed on my air mattress.

Monday and Tuesday, July 6th and 7th – Now that I’m back home, I put away all the stuff that I got from Cheri (crock pot, pots and pans, silverware, cups, bowls, dishes, ect) and all the stuff my family has collected has now been delivered. I brought over the computer and computer desk from the house along with the recliner (it’s so nice to not have to sit on the toilet to put my shoes on). My mom picked up a love seat and chair for free at a garage sale. My brother brought over an old coffee table and end table. My mom picked up a queen sized box spring and mattress so I now officially have furniture in the bedroom. So in short, my living room is complete (would like to get a different TV stand though). My kitchen is pretty much complete. Bathroom only needs a few small items and I have to hang my clothes. Kids rooms have nothing as of yet but at the rate my family and friends are hooking me up, it shouldn’t be long.

Saturday morning, we get up, have some breakfast and swap stories about our flooding tents as we all had some. Started playing cornhole again, only this time Robert & Kristen had taken the kids fishing so we replace Robert with Randy. Picked up where we left off the night before at 1-1. We took it to a game 7 before Tony and I pulled it out. After that we all went down to the beach. Most of the adults stayed up at the picnic table while some laid out in the sun while the kids all tore off into the water. After awhile, we headed back to the campsite for lunch and relaxation. Kids played and rode around on their bikes while the adults took showers, kicked back, took some naps. ect. Eventually, we ate supper of marinated chicken & more shrimp with potatoes. After stuffing ourselves, we went back to your cornhole game and it just got embarressing. Tony and I realed off win after win for about 8-10 straight victories. Brad didn’t want to quit until he won a game so we had to put lanterns under the boards so we could see the holes in the dark. Brad finally gave in and we went and had some smores and sat around the fire. This was a great time around the fire because Samantha was falling asleep on me. After I sent her to bed, Trevor climbed in my lap and did the same. To this day, I love nothing more than my child to fall asleep on me. I’ll miss that when they grow up. Everyone headed off to bed and I went to the tent for my “Cheri time” As great as this weekend was, it really sucked that Cheri and I couldn’t talk. We rely on modern technology to keep us together and apparently camping isn’t modern enough yet.

Sunday morning, I got woke up to the kids yelling at me because they wanted to give me my father’s day cards. So I got up, and all the father’s opened their cards. The kids cards were great, they made them, I assume last week some time. They both had the Michigan logo on them along with father’s day greetings. Couldn’t have asked for better cards. After breakfast, we started to tear down the tents and get ready to leave. We took the kids down to the beach one last time, this time I got in the water with them. Had a really great time there as well because both kids hovered around me the whole time, it was good time with Trevor because we were out pretty deep and he thought he had to hang on to me, we played together awhile and Samantha would pop over and play as well. Like I said, a really good time. After that we changed clothes and headed home.

Best part of the trip home was I was able to talk to Cheri without holding my arm up in the air. As great as a time as I had camping, it was hard not being able to communicate with her. We tell each other what we’re doing most of the time and I think that’s because we’re so far away we both want to know what each other are doing. I was expecting more questions from the family about what was going on, i’m sure they know the stuff about Tina but was expecting question about Cheri. I think they think it’s just a rebound kind of thing and I’ll eventually tire of it. But I don’t see that happening, I see spending a long time with Cheri. We seem to be perfect for each other, like we’ve been waiting for each other our whole lives. Even though we are 600 miles apart, we feel like we’re together most of the time, thanks to technology. The first time we saw each other again, it was like we known each other our whole lives, it was comfortable, no nervousness or anything. We text good mornings and IM goodnights. We text all day long and when we’re both at our homes we IM until bedtime. We don’t put our lives on hold either, we log off to take care of the kids or other commitments. Which tells me i’m not obsessing, i’m in love. Maybe after Cheri and I have been together for a few years, people will start to see the committment we have for each other and take the relationship as serious as we do.

Anyways, I digress. The camping trip probably doesn’t sound like much to most of you. But I had a really good time and have some good memories of time with the kids and the rest of the family. Some time with my older nieces as well, they came to the family late and I get the feeling they aren’t always comfortable around me. I have fun joking around with them, not sure they always do with me. Oh well, good time was had, that’s all that matters. Now I’m back home to real life, not sure that’s really a good thing but it is what it is.